The Gift of Love

Growing up in a traditional Hispanic Catholic family Good Friday was a solemn day. The only television allowed was religious themed movies, The Robe, The Ten Commandments, etc. No music, especially near 3:00 pm, and the only singing allowed all was at church.

My parents were involved in the church as far back as I can remember. My father is a member of the first class of deacons ordained in the Chicago Archdiocese in 1972. As we got older and my parents became more involved in the church things changed and became less rigid. My parents would always think of creative ways to help us not only understand our faith, but actually embrace it.

One particular Good Friday my parents started a different tradition for my six brothers and sisters. We were all called into the living room and told to sit in a circle around a mound of gifts. We tried not to show any excitement since it was Good Friday and we were supposed to be sad. You can only imagine how hard it was for 7 kids to contain their excitement while sitting around a bunch of presents.

My parents began to explain to us that on Good Friday Jesus gave His life for our salvation and they wanted to continue in His tradition of giving. They told us that the act of giving was the reason for our celebration. We had specific instructions on what to do next, my sisters and I were to take our gifts along with a letter from each of our parents and go to our bedrooms. My parents asked that we go back to the living room as soon as we felt ready. Since my brothers were younger they stayed with my parents to open their gifts and chat.

I remember opening my gift with so much excitement that all the catholic guilt about being happy on Good Friday went out the window! My gift was a beautiful music box. Well that really freaked me out.. Good Friday meant NO music unless we were at church. We were to open our mom’s letter first. The first instructions on her letter were to play the music and to read both letters and meditate on the correlation between our celebration and the meaning of Good Friday. I remember feeling my parent’s spiritually and love as I read the letters. Both my mom and dad committed to be better parents. My mom wanted to be there for me to help me deal with crazy teen issues. My dad who worked long hours wanted to reassure me that I was a priority in his life. I remember reading both letters several times and crying because I could not believe that they could BE better parents. With the exception of not having my own Kitty Karry-All, I always felt I lived in a Brady Bunch world.

To this day I am amazed at how much thought went into our gifts that day. Both of my parents worked, had their ministry, and were raising 7 kids. My music box was a silver and porcelain heart. The porcelain top of the heart was a meadow with a mama owl hugging her baby owl and they were sitting on a log. The music ‘We’ve Only Just Begun’ was especially chosen for me since I was in my tween years and my relationship with my mother was just starting to grow.

Since that day, in my heart, Good Friday not only commemorates that Jesus gave His life for me but also reminds me of the gift of LOVE my parents gave me. I continue to try to follow in their footsteps and commit to work at being a better parent each and every day.

It’s spring so I must be Twitterpated ♥

Definition from Urban Dictionary:
Twitterpated
1)to be completely enamored with someone/something. 2) the flighty exciting feeling you get when you think about/see the object of your affection. 3) romantically excited (i.e.: aroused) 4) the ever increasing acceleration of heartbeat and body temperature as a result of being engulfed amidst the exhilaration and joy of being/having a romantic entity in someone's life.

I have been asked several times if I know the secret to a happy relationship/marriage. When I am asked this question it always makes me think of my mother. As a Deacon’s wife she was a relationship counselor to many in our congregation. My mother had a top three list for a loving and healthy relationship:

1) Respect
2) Appreciation
3) Communication

Surprisingly love was not on her top three because she always said that you could not love someone who you did not respect or appreciate. You could not love someone who you did not take the time to truly understand due to a lack of communication. According to my mom if you did not have the top three in your relationship you were not really in love.

Our story starts off as teen-agers growing up in the crazy 80s. Joe and I dated for a couple of years that were filled with House Music, concerts, cruising, and all of the Friday the 13th movies. Then one day we just grew up and went our separate ways. Fast forward 10 years – Joe held the door open for me as I rushed to get my cup of coffee at Dunkin Donuts. At first I didn’t even recognize him he since he was a 20 year old when I last saw him and now he was a man. I was a random woman and he was being a gentleman by holding the door open for me. We have been together ever since that day and the rest is history. In June we will be celebrating our 9th wedding anniversary ♥

This past week was report card day and our daughter, being a typical 14 year old, needed to have a pep talk regarding her grades. I sat back and watched Joe talk to Ash in a way that still gives me goose bumps when I think back to it. Joe remained calm as Ash got upset at the mere thought of losing her cell phone. He was such a caring dad when talking to her all the while being stern when necessary. I felt my respect for Joe grow deeper as he stood his ground and did not let emotions overtake him.

We had a healthy family discussion that resulted in an action plan. We all committed as a family to do whatever possible to help Ash improve her grades. At the end of the conversation after some tears had been shed, Joe sat in silence hugging Ash. The calming hush was an indication that we had weathered the storm.

I had a completely different appreciation for Joe that it literally brought tears to my eyes. I couldn’t help but think back to our early years... is this the same guy who impressed me as a 19 year old by driving a Mustang Cobra? The same guy who took me to Depeche Mode, Eurythmics, and OMD concerts?

So as you can see it is completely possible to be twitterpated by someone who you have known and loved for more than 20 years. Bambi and Thumper never had it so good!

P.S. I’m glad I listened to my mom’s advice !